Back on the yoga mat again

Yesterday I woke up to a body that ached all over.
But not because of some killer yoga workout.
No.
I ached because my body was missing yoga.
How can that be? I promised to do yoga once a day every day for the month of March.
Well...
Time to fess up.
I pushed that promise to the far recesses of my brain throughout last week. I've skipped approximately 8 days this month.
Bailing on my commitment.
Does not feel good.
 
Has this ever happened to you?
You promised yourself you'd eat healthier. No more chocolate. No more potato chips. But then someone leaves a bag of chips behind at your house after a dinner party. And you eat one. Then you eat a handful. Then you think, "Well, I just blew it. There goes my promise. I may as well finish the bag."

I may as well finish the bag?! Crazy, right?

Well, that is exactly what I almost did with my yoga commitment.

"Well, I missed a day. There goes my perfect month of yoga. Won't matter if I miss another day. Or another...I'll just pretend I never made the promise in the first place. I may as well just burn my yoga mat. Get rid of the evidence."

But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't pretend that I had made that promise. That's always there.

The logic gets so crazy in those moments. I mean, who am I hiding from? Myself. The side of myself that wants to be better. And when I break my word to myself I'm only indulging the side of myself that's okay with being complacent. But that is not the game I'm up to. I'm not okay with complacency.

That doesn't mean that I expect to be perfect. That just means that no matter how many times I break my word, I'll keep going back to the mat, so to speak.

Yesterday I could feel my body calling out for Downward Facing Dog. It wanted to be stretched. Lengthened. So I re-committed. I realize there remains only a few more days in the month. But no matter. It's not over. Every day counts.

So last night at 10:52 PM, I got back on the yoga mat again. It felt great. The yoga felt physically energizing (my body was literally buzzing all over after) but also emotionally invigorating. Because I did what I said I was going to do.

On a somewhat related note in the world of March Madness, who isn't inspired by VCU's road to the Final Four?! As Coach Shaka Smart said after their win last night, "Anything is possible."

VCU Reaches 2011 Final Four Thanks to Dominance, Not Luck - SB Nation

Yogi by night

This is my yoga space.

It becomes my yoga space when I roll out my mat. Before that it's our family room. Throw a blanket down and it becomes Malcolm's play area.

But that mat transforms it into my yoga time.

And so far, that has happened exclusively at night. Not until at least 9PM. There have been a few nights where I don't begin until 11:50 PM.

I'm checking in on my promise to do yoga once a day for at least ten minutes every single day in March.

So here's the update. My daily practice has ranged from fifteen minutes on the low end to sixty minutes on the high end. Well... the low end was actually March 4th when I attempted to do my practice with Malcolm. I don't really count that, though.

Things I've learned in 7 days of my yoga journey:

1. Yogis Anonymous is a God send! Two of my friends recommended it to me because they have FREE online classes. And one of my friend's wife is a teacher there. Her name is Aria Mayland and I highly recommend her classes! Check out Yogis Anonymous!

2. A little yoga goes a long way. The days that I only get fifteen minutes in, I still feel the difference. I always begin with breathing to center myself. That alone is worth the trouble.

3. I can feel years of neglect in my muscles. The other night I was doing a cross-legged forward bend and was overwhelmed by how tight my hips are. I used to be so flexible. Especially when I was a dancer. Here's what I realized. The reason I never commit and stick to a daily routine is because I've been unwilling to confront all the years of not being on a daily routine and what that neglect has done to my body. Does this make sense? It's like allowing the laundry to pile up. The more laundry that piles up, the harder it is to confront it.

So that's where I am right now. I'm still hoping to get in a full ninety minute Yogis Anonymous class. Perhaps on the weekend. I'm looking forward to that.

How's this yoga-once-a-day challenge going for you? Anyone out there following along at home?

Oh- one more thing... I've been doing Itsy Bitsy Yoga with Malcolm... hoping to give him the gift of yoga. He seems to like it.

March YOGA Madness

Maybe it's the date on the calendar. March 1st already. Already! Reminding me that time continues to click away.

Or it's the fact that the snow has almost completely melted and the sun is blazing promising a high of 46 degrees. Giving Chicagoans that Spring feeling. That time-to-get-exercising-again feeling. That bathing-suit-season-is-just-around-the-corner feeling.

Or perhaps it's the fact that my little baby is now over 17 pounds and I feel that added weight in my body. In my shoulders, my arms, my lower back.

Likely it's a combination of it all.

But no matter the reason, last night before collapsing into bed feeling my age in my joints, it hit me.

I need yoga.

I need to get back in touch with my body.

I need to breathe.

I need to nurture myself.

I need to take time out of my day - even if only for 10 minutes - to breathe, stretch and check-in with my body.

I need yoga.

My Month of Yoga
So for the entire month of March I am committing to doing yoga every single day.

Every day.

Every single day.

Without skipping.

Without excuses.

Yoga once a day every day for at least ten minutes.

I know... ten minutes doesn't sound like much. But it's so much better than nothing. And if I commit to ten minutes, it's more than likely those ten minutes will stretch into something longer.

Ten minutes isn't intimidating.

And it's enough for at least a few sun salutations.

My goal is an hour a day. But there are some days that it's too challenging to carve out that hour. So at the very least it's ten minutes.

I'm really excited about this. I can't remember the last time I exercised every single day for a month without fail. I'm looking forward to having a conversation with my body again. And getting to know each other. I expect to be good friends by the end of the month.

The cost of doing yoga
Yoga classes are not in our budget.
And neither is a gym membership.
That means I'll be practicing yoga at home. Luckily I already have a mat and yoga blocks.
But that's it. I mean, I don't have any yoga DVDs.
So this is where I could use some help.

If there are any Yogis out there reading this... could you please recommend your favorite (beginner) poses to do if you only had ten minutes to practice?

Also, any online sources for Yoga inspiration?

Thank you so much! I'll be checking back in with my progress.

And lastly, does anyone out there want to join me?

Please talk to me in the comments below!

Happy March 1st, everyone!

Love,
Steph

(the above image is from yogawonders.com)

Waiting is Not Living... and Why I Wouldn't Want to Be Al Franken

Lately, I feel like I've just been waiting for things to happen. Waiting for the bank to decide on our short sale, waiting to be approved for a modification, waiting to hear back from multiple theatre companies on my plays... and it's driving me crazy. I'm trying not to wait around. I'm "trying" to let go and give it over to the universe and just keep living every day. "Trying" is one of my least favorite words. How do you just stop waiting and start living? How do you get that question out of your mind?

How, I wonder, is Al Franken doing with this? He has been waiting for a long time to be named the Senator of Minnesota. Since November. A lot has happened since November and still he's waiting. I suppose you could say that Norm Coleman has been waiting too. But a court just ruled in Franken's favor (check it out) and Coleman is appealing again... thus extending the wait. How is he not going crazy? What is he doing in this time? How do you live when you're waiting?

I don't think you do. I mean, I don't think you can. Waiting isn't living. It's suspension. It's forgetting to breathe. It's a clenched jaw. Restless sleep. The stiffness in my neck. Glazed eyes.

I don't know how you stop waiting. Maybe it has to do with breathing. Walking and breathing. Running hard and breathing. Sweating. Listening. And reaching out. Getting out of your own head and making a difference for someone else. I could start there. I keep thinking yoga would help. Yoga and volunteerism. This is a Zen thing, right? Chop Wood, Carry Water.

Get up away from the desk and take a short walk. Close the e-mail and don't check it for the rest of the day. Drink a glass of water. Call a friend or family member just to say hi. Be present in the conversation. Then back to the desk. Back to work. No longer waiting.

Well, it's worth a try.

-Al Franken

-Chop Wood, Carry Water