Leaving stuff behind

Wednesdays my mom comes into the city to take care of Malcolm so that I can get some writing done. She gets quality alone time with Malcolm and I get quality alone time with myself. It's a win-win.

Last Wednesday I was at Dolce Casa (my local cafe) writing when I was approached by a stranger.

"Can I ask you something," this young woman began, "I just need an unbiased opinion."

"Shoot," I said. Well, not really. I probably said, "Of Course." Or more likely, "Sure."

"If someone leaves their belongings behind after a move, how long before they are considered abandoned?"

Hmmm.... sounds like an interesting story. We dug in. Turns out she had an issue with a former roommate who had left a bunch of junk behind after moving out. This woman in the cafe had called and e-mailed her former roommate to find out where to send the stuff, but never heard back. For two months. Until last Wednesday. After two months, the former roommate e-mailed to ask about her stuff.

The problem? Well, this woman in the cafe had just moved out of the apartment herself. She didn't know what happened to this person's stuff because she left it behind. It wasn't hers to move.

This got me going. I have no tolerance for this sort of behavior. Let's face it. Moving is no picnic. And in some circumstances it can be utter Hell on earth.

So, yes, I know how tempting it is to just leave crap behind for someone else to deal with. I know how tempting it is to just walk away. But it's just bad form. It's inconsiderate. Your stuff left behind always becomes someone else's problem. Whether it's the new owners or the landlord... someone else has to deal with it.

The night before we had to be out of our house, we had a whole driveway full of our crap. We tried to sell and give away as much as possible. But time just ran out on us. So, we paid to have it hauled away so that the new owners wouldn't have to when they moved in. Why? Because. Call it good form. Good Karma. Either way...

While it's good to let go of your crap, it's never good to leave it for someone else to clean up. 

But I'm preaching to the choir here, aren't I?

No Bull, No Baloney... Just Getting it Done

After rebounding from my darkest moment in this entire experience I am very happy to report that THINGS ARE LOOKING UP!

How? Why? What's going on?

Well, I'll tell you.

It all began on Tuesday morning when Bob declared this week a "Bull---- Free Week." As in, no baloney. No messing around. Just getting it done. Making it happen. Turning it all around. It was a powerful declaration and I got on board.

With a foreclosure looming on the horizon and no word from the short sale negotiator, I decided to call Countrywide and request a Postponement of the Foreclosure. That was an interesting/frustrating couple of hours. I actually "tweeted" (yes, Littof is on Twitter! Follow us) in real time while I was on the phone. If anyone is interested in what that looks like, here's a screen shot of my tweets from Tuesday. Click on the image to enlarge, then read bottom up to get the progression:



The bottom-line is that I was given the run-around (per usual) for a while until I was told by someone in the short sale department that they had no record of our offer, our file was closed and they wouldn't be able to postpone the foreclosure.

No record of the offer?! We submitted it weeks ago! What the hell?!

I e-mailed our Realtor that has been handling the negotiations with our lenders and expressed my utter confusion and frustration. She sent me our negotiator's phone number and said I could try to call him but that she'd been leaving him messages and hadn't heard back. I did call him and I left a message asking him to get in touch with me as I'm worried and had questions. I tried to sound sweet and not like the crazed banshee that was raging inside.

About an hour later, our Realtor called with our negotiator on the line. The negotiator said he was looking at the offer and not to worry, he could have it approved by Wednesday evening.

"See? There's nothing to worry about," said our Realtor. I know, but I won't rest until this deal is done and the foreclosure is off my back, I told her. She said she understood completely.

She was right, though. Because Wednesday morning it was approved. Phew! Finally!

Next step was to get the approval from National City (our 2nd mortgage.)

And we got that yesterday! Just like that. Getting it done. No Bull----. As soon as the National City approval came through, we entered 'escrow' (see definition at the bottom of the post) and the buyers were already scheduling the property and termite inspections.

What does this mean?

This means we are on the path to successfully avoid foreclosure.
We will officially celebrate when we close. But, this is good. Great, actually. Things are looking up, indeed.

Our closing date is June 27th. 30 days. That means we have one month left in this house. That means that we can start selling things. We can start planning. We can begin to move on. Yesterday, I sold (with lots of help from a friend) enough books to earn $109 on abebooks.com. Today I'm cleaning the house, getting more boxes, selling my remaining books at a used book store, bringing some items to Goodwill, planning a giant estate sale. Moving on.

Yesterday as my friend and I itemized our belongings and entered them into an excel spreadsheet, it hit me, this is actually exciting. I mean it. I'm excited to sell all this stuff. I didn't think I could do it. But I am and I'm excited. I think I'd feel totally different if I were packing everything and having to store it somewhere until who knows when. That would be completely different.

"Yeah, how depressing," said my friend.

This is exciting and not depressing because it's an adventure. An opportunity to learn. To wipe the slate clean and begin again.

Last week Bob said to me,

"I don't want to acquire things. I want to acquire experiences."

And that's exactly it. That's what I want our life to be. Acquiring experiences. I think it's what I've always wanted. And that's what we're doing. Yes, this has been incredibly challenging, but I am so grateful for the experiences we've 'acquired' in the process. We are far more interesting now than before. Lighter, freer, happier. And Bull Shit Free.

What's escrow?

From Realtor.com:

Escrow opens when the buyer and seller sign a sales contract, commonly called a real estate purchase agreement and receipt of deposit. The contract, along with any additional instructions, serves as instructions for the escrow officer.

Escrow assures that the lender releases the home purchase funds at or about the same time that the deed is recorded to reflect new ownership. Escrow includes depositing, with a neutral third party, funds, documents and instructions necessary to complete the transfer.

For us, escrow means that things are moving ahead. But, like I said, we won't officially celebrate until the deal is done. Until June 27th.

Any readers want to elaborate on the ramifications of escrow in California? Do it in the comments below! Thanks!

The Face of Foreclosure- Part 2

"The Inquisition"

Just a quick recap:
I experience darkest moment of whole foreclosure experience which leads to a day of recovery in the form of movie watching. We've just finished KUNG FU PANDA and I'm feeling a little better thanks to that delightful film. Now I'm ready for public. At least I think I am. I think it will be good for me to get up off the couch, shower, make a salad and eat smoked ribs with other human beings. This, I believe, I can handle.

And on with the story:
I'm now at the BBQ, picking the meat off said ribs and telling a couple of friends how we are planning a sale to sell everything. I know I shouldn't bring it up. My goal was to NOT talk about the house. I'm still feeling on the verge of tears. Feeling "leaky," as it were. But I bring it up because, well, I just... they're offering to help. So I say, "Thank you. That would be great!" and that's the end of that. Next topic. Something more cheerful, please?

But, someone had been listening. And decided to join the conversation. Not a terrible crime. It is a BBQ. We're all friends of friends. But I don't know this person and I really don't want to talk to strangers about our financial disaster. It's my own fault. I shouldn't have brought it up. "You're selling everything?" he asks. We'll call him Bud. Do I really have to answer him?

ME: Yes.
BUD: Why?
ME: Um, well...(would it be rude to say I really don't want to talk about it?)
BUD: Are you moving?
ME: Yes.
BUD: Why?
ME: Well, we're selling our house.
BUD: Why?
ME: (oh my freaking lord) Why?
BUD: It's a terrible time to sell. It's the worst time to sell.
ME: Yes, I know.
BUD: Then why?
ME: Because we have to.
BUD: Why?
ME: (seriously?!?!) Because we can't afford it anymore.
BUD: Why?
ME: (speechless)
BUD: Can't you rent it out?
ME: (is this really happening right now?!) No. That won't work.
BUD: Oh. What about refinancing? You should try that.
ME: We did.
BUD: You did?
ME: (getting pretty pissy now) We tried everything. (period. end of conversation.)
BUD: But you really shouldn't sell now if you can--
ME: (cutting him off... ripping off the band-aid) We're in foreclosure!

Suddenly all eyes at this big, long table are on me. Followed by a chorus of:

"Ooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh."
(Which translates to: how sad, you poor thing, glad that's not me, yikes, etc.)

ME: Yeah.

Just then Bob returns with beverages. A beer for himself (homemade by the host!) and a Mexican Coke for me. What makes it Mexican? It's imported. From Mexico. And it's awesome. It's way better than American Coke. Why? It has Sugar Cane instead of High Fructose Corn Syrup and it always comes in a glass bottle. It's a classy choice by our host to provide Mexican Coke. Classy.

BOB: How's it going?
ME: Oh, fine. Thanks for the Coke! (I turn to my friends) Look! Mexican Coke!

I am desperate for anything else to talk about.

FRIEND: What's Mexican Coke?

So I explain. With relish and great detail. I'm grateful for this new conversation. To have something so trivial to discuss. I am aware that Bud has turned his questions to Bob. I try not to listen. But I hear him fire away. And I hear Bob answer each one with great patience and generosity. Today I'm Doom and he's Hope.

Bob explains how he lost his job and... so this Mexican Coke is so good, right? It's pretty sweet, but better flavor and better for you. Right?

Okay, the thing is... this is exactly why we started this blog. Why? To answer people's questions. To pull back the curtain. There are a lot of people who are terrified that our experience will become their experience. They're afraid the same thing will happen to them and we have been willing to share our experience to hopefully make a difference for others. It was our choice to do this. To become the walking face of foreclosure.

Bob tells me later that Bud's questions were coming from his own fear. He and his wife had just bought a house and she had apparently just lost her job. Our reality is his biggest fear right now. Bob said that he seemed really negative about their situation so he was trying to leave them with some hope.

I get it. People want to know what they can do to NOT end up like us. And they want to know what it's like in case they do. Like a former co-worker of mine. At least once a week he would say to me, "I want you to tell me more about foreclosure because I'm afraid we'll end up there soon."

So, if there are any readers out there with the same fears.... I hope this blog helps. I hope you learn from our mistakes. I hope we leave you with some hope. I hope you don't spend too much time worrying. I hope you don't let your fears (like I did on Sunday) possess you. And it's okay if you do. We get it. Trust me. We get it.

At this point I invite you to ask us questions.
What do you want to know? Ask anything.

You can do that in the comments section below.

Or send us an e-mail at:

loveinthetimeofforeclosure@gmail.com

Please. Ask away. That's what we're here for!


-Where to buy Mexican Coke? Costco of course [Serious Eats]

What is Home?

We've been thinking a lot about home lately. I wrote in one of my posts that a house is not a home without love. Well, what is a home without a house?

One of the quotes on the Airstream website is: "Home is where you are."

We tend to agree.

Speaking of Airstream, we've been fantasizing about selling everything, moving into one and venturing out onto the open road... towing our home behind us. It would be a mobile live/work space. And it would be fabulous. We'd see things we'd never seen before, we'd be free and the great American outdoors would be our 'backyard.' That's the fantasy.

The reality is that we can't afford to buy an Airstream (new or used) but if Airstream were to say give us one (I said it was a fantasy, didn't I?) well...

The idea of selling everything and paring our lives down to the absolute bare minimum is thoroughly appealing and equally frightening. I say I don't want to be attached to the material, but am I capable of living in a 200 square foot space? Am I cut out for that? On one hand it seems perfect. Bob can work anywhere as long as he has wifi and I can write anywhere. We could live almost anywhere. We could, as the Airstream motto goes, SEE MORE, DO MORE, LIVE MORE!

And I do love the design of the Airstream. So sleek. And you can do almost anything-- including solar-pimping. You can be eco-friendly. Check this out:


The Portable Planet-Friendly Home at Sprig

It seems like the perfect thing to do now while we have the chance because when else are we going to be so displaced without a plan? It could be our best chance to raise the anchor and be vagabonds for a bit. No matter where go we know we'll be working extremely hard. This is the time for that. And how much space do we need for that? Another bonus about living in a tiny space: it's so much easier to clean. Right?

Could you do it? Would you? Anyone out there done it before and have some insight to share? Please do. Share away in the comments section. I'd love to hear your thoughts.

So will we end up in an Airstream or pop-up camper? I don't know. We've had lots of extremely generous offers from friends and family to stay with them for a while. And that's most likely where we'll head. Back to the Chicago area to stay with my family for a bit. Work our butts off to make something happen. Then either rent an apartment back in L.A. or buy an Airstream trailer and act out our nomadic fantasy.

For now, I surf the web and try to imagine a home on wheels.

Here's another one I found today on Inhabitat. It's a pretty amazing concept. Very Jetsons. And unfortunately it's still only a concept. Instead of popping up, it fans out and there's a weather-protective skin that stretches over the top.


Click HERE for more pictures of the Expandable Mobile Mini House.


Links:

The very fancy Design Within Reach trailer - Airstream

Airstream Trailer Serves Eco-Nomads - Cnet News

Small Space Ideas from an Airstream Trailer - Apartment Therapy

The Expandable Mobile Mini House - Inhabitat