SATURDAY: YES, we STILL live here.

So it's Saturday and it's beautiful. Blue skies, somewhere in the low 70s, Michigan State is on their way to the Finals. Go Spartans. My mom went there and I grew up cheering for them too.

I'm outside enjoying the day, on the phone with my sister about to get some work done in the vegetable garden when I hear someone at our gate. I look up and see feet. I hear voices. And then the Supra key in action.

Oh crap!

I run inside.

"Bob! Someone's here! Do we have a showing?!"

He runs interference while I hide inside. The house is a mess. The Open House is Sunday and we haven't started cleaning yet. If we have a showing, no one told us.

Bob's talking to the woman. I can't hear what he's saying. I'm running around the house frantically putting things away in case he decides to let her in to see the house.

Thankfully he doesn't.

"What was that all about?"

"She was just gonna come in!!"

Not again. Not another one. This has happened before. This is why we took the lock box off the door. One weekend I had just finished walking naked from the shower to the bedroom to get dressed when an agent opened our FRONT DOOR and tried to parade his clients through our house WITHOUT AN APPOINTMENT! Yeah.

So here we were again. Luckily this one was stopped at the gate and we were all fully-clothed. Bob asked her if she had an appointment and she said that yes, and her clients were on their way. He clarified and asked, "No, do you have an appointment with US? Did you call our agent?" Blank stare. He pointed out the fact that on the MLS instructions it say that you must make an appointment 24 hours in advance.

This was her response: "Oh, you still live here?"

No. We just leave our car in the driveway and garden on the weekends and hang out and let our dog run around and sleep here and eat here and work here, but we don't live here anymore.

YES, WE STILL LIVE HERE. Hello.

So we now we have a sign. It says:

SHOWN BY APPOINTMENT ONLY!!!

DO NOT DISTURB TENANTS!!!

We'll see if that works.

If it doesn't, we could always take the advice of one of our friends and add the friendly touch of an NRA sticker to the sign. Hmmm...